relatable af
First I just draw this head, then erase some of the details… there! A circle!
Remember, Wilford Brimley (the “diabeetus guy” who was in those ads to lean on his fame as an actor) didn’t start acting until he was in his 30s and didn’t make it on screen until his 40s, and he wasn’t a big actor until his 50s.
When I went back to college in 2020 about half of my graduating class was over the age of 30 and about a third was over the age of 50 (and honestly the older students landed by far the cushiest jobs by graduation, so they were able to skip about 10-15 years of career progression based on prior work experience in an entirely different industry/profession
This doesn’t bother me. They’re usually the type who put the work in to get where they are so they deserve it.
If it was a talentless incompetent hack who cheated their way through life and reaping the benefits they don’t deserve, now that bothers me.
I had this when I discovered that my first friend who we bonded over computer achieved a better job at the same company. But I later landed a promotion that outdid him, so he can fuck right off. And now I’m in another highly desirable / competitive role. I’ve reached a point in my career where I’ve got nothing to prove to anyone but myself. It feels pretty great.
Hey, at least my feelings are accurate
Mine is JSchlatt ._.
I will never understand comparing one’s self to others. You’re like comparing Xbox to PlayStation. I remember my mother comparing my siblings and I to our cousins who were hustling at a young age (looking back now as an adult, it wasn’t a good thing considering their circumstances at the time). I retorted by saying they’re different people, why should I care? Then thankfully my dad backed me up from my mom’s nonsense!
Opposite for me. Parents always put me down and compared me to others. When I told my mum I wanted to be a plumber because they make a lot of money, she made me clean the toilets in the house for 2 years.
But that desire to gain your parents’ approval is strong. I was a dumb kid with bad grades, and while I got into university, it wasn’t a top tier one. Worked my butt off everyday, in part because I never got that praisal. Slow and steady, but I finally made it to a good job.
(Granted, plumbers still make a lot and my parents were kind of dicks for not realizing that, but my ambitions grew greater than that dream)
Huh, you know what, I don’t think I feel like this anymore. I used to, but now it doesn’t bother me. Thank you for making me realize I have grown.
I think it’s worse when they’re younger than you
At the age of 8 he enrolled at The University of South Alabama, where he received in 1994 a bachelor’s degree in anthropology and is listed in the Guinness Book as the world’s youngest university graduate at the age of ten. At the age of 14 he obtained a master’s degree in chemistry at Middle Tennessee State University. At age 18 he obtained his master’s degree in computer science at Vanderbilt University.
I often use that as a source of encouragement rather than defeat. My two favorite sports are snowboarding and muay thai which are filled with people who’ve been practicing before they formed memories. If a child is better than me then I’m almost certainly capable of becoming that good with continued practice. Even if it takes years it’s something to aspire to regardless of the relative age difference. I was one of those kids who was way better than a lot of people on a dirt bike. I was put on a dirt bike at the age of 4 and don’t even remember learning, so it’s not like it’s a fair comparison. Just run your own race and aspire to be like those around you.
That’s a nicer way to look at things
This day was going to be perfect,
The kind of day of which I dreamed since I was snall
The really fun part is that the first few times this happens to you, you’re the same age and feel insecure that someone your age achieved more, but as you age in to your mediocrity you gradually get to see people who are younger and younger than you achieve more than you ever did, and now, likely ever will. But hey, there’s always the memes to take your mind off it… oh wait.
…as you age into your mediocrity…
I feel attacked.
Remember boys and girls, we born different, we build different. We have a lot in common, but than there are your relatives, friends, teachers, city where you were born etc. You can compare two things only if you have all other variables are equal, which is impossible. Doing your best is different everyday as well as every month and every year. Achievements of others shouldn’t bother you, only your life goals should.
Don’t compare someone’s highlight reel to your behind the scenes.
I once convinced someone that they are actually doing a great job by sharing my struggles and showing that they are not an impostor. They now outshine me and will go to even greater heights.
And while that one episode of dealing with burnout and impostor syndrome is a drop in the ocean of their persistence, it’s a great illustration to how misleading comparison to others is.
PS: Also, if you have ADHD, you’re nearsighted in time. That doesn’t only mean “you can’t plan well”, it means “your life looks like a hazy blob, where others see a complex scenery”. And that can be devastating when doing a comparison. Be kind to yourself, be kind to others.
It should also be mentioned that “talent” doesn’t exist. Anyone that is good at something has put a ton of time and effort into practice. You’re not born with skills, you refine them. Doesn’t matter if you’re an insanely skilled artist of some kind or if you’re a darkness-dwelling, aurora-ignoring retro game speed runner, if you’re good at something its because you earned that skill through countless hours of practice.
nuh-UH. Nope.
Talent ≠ practice ; talent + practice = greatness
Thankfully it’s usually quite easy to dispel this myth by saying “then why are you bad at maths”. We all had the same number of hours in maths class as kids, but some had to practice WAY MORE to achieve a passable grade.
Most people can’t be Mozart. Some dedicate their lives to music, and do not get a fraction of the way there.
“Talent doesn’t exist” is a lie we tell ourselves as a society because our individualist culture sells us a pipe dream of personal greatness that many/most people literally aren’t equipped to achieve no matter how hard they try (and we should try regardless).
Talent might be practice because you used the same part of your brain on other aspects of life.
For example, if you gamed early in life, this “practice” may contribute to you being good with your brain, which makes you “talented” in math.
Playing with dolls in early life may lead to being more creative, and this being more talented in drawing.
The practicing begins the moment you start interacting with the world.
Or something along those lines.
You think we all had the same amount of hours in math class as a kid but you conveniently ignore variables like focus, interest and after hours practice, among others I can’t think of I’m sure.
If you took guitar class with me back in high school and only practiced during class and for assigned homework, I’m absolutely smoking you right out of the gate because I’m also spending 3hrs minimum every night practicing for fun. Double that on most weekends.
Its all about the time you put into the skill. If you are engaged with practicing a particular skill because you genuinely enjoy it, you’re going to have a much easier time than someone who struggles to enjoy it. Math class is the perfect example. Many kids loathe math class while others love it. The kids that love it are gonna engage with it with more focus both in-class and at home. That practice and study directly translates to proficiency.
Nah, I hate maths and never studied at home. Still did way better than kids with difficulties that were studying way more.
Not studying didn’t pay off in higher education (focus issues, possibly undiagnosed ADHD or related), because talent ALONE is not enough anymore, but before then I had an objectively easier time than most and that was with little time or interest devoted to it.We ALL use the concept of “left” and “right” daily. I’ve been doing that instinctively without a problem since I was, like, 8. Some adults still need to use a mnemonic every single time. Is that because they don’t have enough interest or didn’t spend as much time on it as 8 yo me did? Of course not.
I have put hundreds of hours into one of my hobbies, digital photography. I really like it. I have watched and read plenty of theory and know most of what there is to know about what makes a good picture. My photographs are only halfway decent and nowhere near what they should be given my time investment. And that’s OK, because I know it’s not because of anything I did and I like the hobby anyway.
Your argument does not have a leg to stand on. Someone with music agnosia cannot learn to play the guitar like you do. Dyslexics cannot “just study like I did” their way into being good at mental arithmetic. Pretending that skill is ONLY a function of time and drive is extremely pretentious and factually incorrect. It’s the “you’re depressed? Just do like me, think happy thoughts” of education.
Talent definitely exists.
yes thisss i wanted to say this. if theres something u really really wanna do but dont have a talent for it, learn it, practice, get better and u can do it. applies to virtually anything
Built different (incorrectly)
Nobody is build incorrectly
(yes I know it was about a typo, but this comment on its own looks to hostile)
I was gonna say something like this but you already said it, so imma add to yours
Everyone is talented in some way-- you might not be able to sing, or do acrobatics, or drive a racecar, but you can do other things. Everybody can do something, yes your somethings might be different but that’s normal and perfectly fine. Things like talent and beauty are purely subjective, and even if you think you have neither of them that’s just your opinion.
I do agree with this as well, but wanted to add a little something that might give a different perspective. Let’s say you are extremely gifted at being a computer engineer and you don’t know it. Nowadays probably you start fiddling with computers and eventually find out. Let’s say that you are gifted for this, but instead being born nowadays, you were born in the 1800. There is no way to know you were a gifted computer engineer back then because, well, computers didn’t really exist. The inverse also applies as well. If you are extremely good at lightning up street lamps, nowadays that skill is not relevant, since no one needs to light up street lamps manually anymore.
I do think these skills have usually some sort of equivalent (even tangentially) and you find out what you can be good at. Is it your optimal skill? I do not think we can effectively know, since everything is not available from both present, past and future, all at once to be exposed to.
That does make sense, but I don’t quite agree. To continue with your gifted-computer-engineer-from-the-1800s example, they aren’t just good at computers-- they have the underlying skills (problem solving, attention to detail, able to apply abstract concepts to concrete objects, taking account of the whole system, good at maths, etc) and if they were born now, they also have an interest in computers. But if they were in the 1800s they would still have all those things (except for the interest in computers) and they’d be able to apply them to be good at other things
Before digital computers existed, humans were the computers! (first referenced as an occupation in 1613)
Skills are transferable, though there definitely are many cases where people aren’t able to access the tools and education they might need to make the most of their talents because of lack of privilege and systemic oppression (which basically means facing more obstacles to gain access to the same tools and education as the most privileged get handed to them).
So when you were born definitely matters, but so does where, to who, what gender you were assigned at birth, how abled or disabled you are, and so on and so on…
Yeah, I can shitpost real good…
As an enby, I’m going to choose petty spite and forget that we’re born different
Haha suckers doing more shit while i’m just chillin is this supposed to make me jealous lol ?
Try to find out where or what you really shine at, and keep going through that way!
To shine at something you have to put effort into it. Usually it’s the lack of willpower that makes us average. Look at exceptional people, they succeed in very different areas.
What do you do when you don’t shine at anything?
and meanwhile stop comparing yourself to others
