Last time, I used: “Anybody need anything while I’m out?” and that went over well. May not make it through this surgery on Friday, so I turn to Lemmy for top-notch suggestions for my potential last words!
It’s pretty clear to me many people here have never either had general anesthesia or talked to anyone who had, you can’t really time funny one-liners right before you pass out.
Here’s how it works:
They’ll put a mask with a rubber tube in your mouth for oxygen, and tell you to relax and count back from 10, so you start counting impatiently(it’s boring, and there is nothing else to do), wondering when the surgery is going to start.
Ten.
Nine.
Eight.
Now the anesthesiologist is in front of you, checking on you to see if you’re OK. “But I haven’t finish counting down yet, when is the surgery going to start?” You ask them.
“It’s already over”, they explain.
Then you realize you are in a completely different room, the tube is no longer in your mouth, but you feel so weak you can hardly move, and the stitches/staples around your new surgery wound is starting to itch.
It’s like a segment of your life was cut out and erased into nothingness.
“Who’s making toast?”
“How do you keep a surgical staff in suspense?”
a surgical staff
That is not a group of medical professionals, that is a wizard’s stick with amputation powers!
Saying I don’t consent to surgery isn’t the best thing to say. But gosh the the doctors face… priceless
Any professional would cancel the procedure at this point. Too much liability now.
Good luck on the surgery OP