Do you openly do it while the other is around? Do you let them know in case they want to join? Do you only masturbate when they’re not around? Curious to know what others do
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Got into chastity play so my wife usually gives me a week free to have sex and masterbate as much as possible. After that she asks me to lock up in a chastity cage. She has the key and so the only sexual contact I get is when she decides to unlock me and play. Usually it’s a month without a full orgasm. She loves my lust for her and that I will go down on her, fuck her without an orgasm for myself and just generally want to please her. She and I both enjoy the power exchange and the pent up sexual energy. It really is a wild form of play that we started during the pandemic and we’ve kept it up because it is fun. It is so difficult to fuck her to orgasm without sending myself over the edge. She loves it!
Sex is a bonding experience with pleasurable physical sensations that takes time and planning to attain. Masturbation is a physical/sexual health act; this question makes as much sense to me as “How do you and your partner deal with showering?” or “How do you and your partner deal with pooping?” would.
I guess maybe the actual question here is something like: “Do you or your partner see masturbation as being in competition with paired sexual intimacy?” If that’s the case, I’ll use a simple food metaphor.
Sometimes I want to put together a nice steak dinner with all the fixin’s, and sometimes I just want some beef jerky.
When you gotta rub you gotta rub. Do you want to be with them? Yes or no? I dunno, seems like people getting their feelings hurt by their partner making themselves feel good while alone is dumb in the same way you have to navigate other trust issues in relationships: if they are who they are and you don’t want to be with them as they are, it’s not a good fit, and if you can, then great.
If they just want to masturbate and never have sex, and that doesn’t work for you, I guess you can try to change them, but in the end, you’re asking them to change for you.
Edit: oh, but be honest. Don’t lie about shit. If they asked you if you did and you did, just grin and say you did. It doesn’t have to be weird.
