The title is really vague, so I’ll try to clarify my intentions here:

I am an ardent supporter of FOSS. It will be greatly beneficial for my life and especially my privacy to self-host such software. Yet, I cannot find much motivation to do so.

However, when it comes to hosting software for public use, I can usually give my utmost concentration and dedication.

This is not how I want my life to be. I want to be motivated for myself as well as for the community. And if that’s not possible, I need to trick my brain into bringing me into that kind of zone for myself.

What do I do? What would you do in this situation?

  • Findmysec@infosec.pubOP
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    5 months ago

    Not sure - I don’t feel like I undervalue myself (although I guess that’s exactly what someone in my situation would say lmao). I just don’t find motivation in doing something solely for myself, and am instead invested in things that I think the community could benefit from. An example would be wanting to run a Public Searx/Invidious instance

    • apotheotic (she/her)@beehaw.org
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      5 months ago

      Yeah I hear you! But crucially its

      • a problem you have within yourself, that you’ve identified you want to change
      • a problem you don’t know how to change

      You don’t need to have deep trauma or self-harming tendencies for therapy to be of value to you! But it does indeed sound like I’m off the mark on the self-worth thing. (That’s why I’m not a therapist).

      Worst case scenario, you have a few sessions and don’t find anything to sink your teeth into and you’ve wasted a few hours Better case scenario, you find a root cause or at least a path to a better way of doing things.

      But hey, I tell just about everyone to get therapy :P