This is my first time writing a post (and in an internet forum).
Last year, I found about narcissism through a few videos on YouTube. I was able to come to a conclusion that my parents (and some relatives) were narcissistic. They had shown these traits throughout my childhood.
Since then, I’ve been trying to make a couple of changes in order to help with the situation with my parents (like moving to another room, grey rocking). But it had a few side effects.
I’ve had to sacrifice self-care for a few months in order to remain low-contact. I’ve tried subtly asking them to get self-care products so I cope with most of the things going around at our house (we had a bug/fly problem, and much more).
Nowadays it isn’t much safe and I want to be able to change that. Is there any possible way to still live with the situation (until you’re at an age where you can get a steady income, have some independence)?
I’m sorry you’re in such a bad spot, that sounds really hard. Are you able to share more specifically what type of self-care you feel you’re missing?
If you are able, it might be helpful to begin to formulate an exit plan. Try to put some money aside if you’re able (in an account they don’t have access to, if that’s a concern). Look into resources and therapy that might be available (if you’re in school, your school might offer this for free and confidentially). Is there someone in your life you trust to talk through what you’re dealing with?
I can list a few basic things (like showering, brushing teeth, etc.) The bathrooms at our house aren’t well maintained, but it’s usually rare to find little to no flies (or any sort of bug) in the upstairs one. Otherwise, I’m not able to use the restrooms to do the things I need to do.
I was considering about finding a support system through chat rooms, although school would be nice, except I remember I would avoid trying to initiate a conversation with teachers, students, etc. through my middle school years. I’ll be a freshman in a few days, so yeah that’s something to think about.