DISCLAIMER - I am not planning on fighting a pelican.
there’s a brown pelican that hangs out on the railing of a very narrow portion of a boardwalk nearby. the only reason it makes me nervous is because it’s huge, but their nails look short, and their beaks are pointed, but curved downwards so they would have to try to bite me with that long thing instead of pecking me.
like, if a bird capable of clawing or eating my eyes out attacked my face, I’d honestly have no qualms about killing it immediately. but if I ever get attacked by a pelican, it looks like I could just kind of hold it off without having to hurt it. am I right in that?
You can never plan to fight a pelican. It just happens. We’ve all been there.
it’s a long-standing tradition. all official pelican fights must be a surprise
Everybody has a plan until then get punched in the face.
right punch the pelican in the face with another pelican. that’s how you win
I haven’t. Did I miss much?
I’ve been attached by geese though.
Emotionally or physically?
Rejection hurts 🤕
Not as much as geese bites. They’re vicious medium sized bastards.
I don’t live in a place that’s even remotely hospitable for pelicans but you’re right. It just kind of happens sometimes. Like a fact of life