Main ones I can think of:
- Be attractive. If unattractive, at least be disabled in some way.
- Dress as skimpily as possible. Show legs at all time if female.
- Forget dancing, just throw your partner around. Get your face to her crotch at any opportune moment.
- Make really inappropriate comments to each other during the talking phase. Really sell the idea you’re having an affair on live camera.
- Choose the shittiest pop songs you can find. Make sure it’s not the original, but some shitty mock-soul cover.
- If a presenter, give off the impression of fighting a sickly illness. Anorexia is desired if possible.
Any other rules I’m missing?
The other judges are genuinely useless
Not entirely: they provide the lowest common denominator with cheap entertainment. But, you know, the same can be said for the whole show.