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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: June 10th, 2023

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  • I’ve never seen it either. I’ve heard of it though, but only in wealthier areas. Working class people don’t have the luxury of deciding to pay extra to alleviate human suffering - it’s the same reason walmart consumes all other choices; the average person chooses the cheapest option because they’re already scraping by. A more relatable take would be to just opt out of eating at places that demand tips – I already do that, but only because I can’t afford to eat out anyway :)


  • Did you read their comment beyond the first two words?

    They explicitly said to stop tipping by deciding to instead go to places that ban tipping, price goods higher, and pay their employees fairly. None of your argument about “you need to tip people who rely on tips” applies to what they said. You jumped to your “haha gotcha” moment a bit prematurely.


  • It’s times like these that I’m glad I am autistic. You neurotypicals really over-complicate things and make life difficult for yourselves.

    How to flirt as an autistic person: make a friend over shared interests, spend time together sharing that interest, realize they’re enjoyable to be around, communicate clearly “I enjoy spending time with you, let’s do it more often”, slowly morph into a relationship out of convenience. Done.

    I cannot understand NT mind-games and obsessive preening. Don’t you get frustrated with it? And to think - someone who puts that much effort into judging you upfront is likely to keep judging things about you all your life, with no end to playing games… Stressful, no thank you.



  • MantidSys@kbin.socialto196@lemmy.blahaj.zonerule
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    5 months ago

    Claiming that being a femboy is necessarily partially kink is harmful. Would you say the same about other nonbinary people? Is being a tomboy driven by kink? Is being trans driven by kink?

    I think you’re telling on your own views more than you’re explaining how the world works. Identity exists separate from sexuality, full stop. Unless you want to revoke all trans and nonbinary identities from aro/ace people too.

    And just in case you’re just talking about how people view femboys - who cares? Some people view the LGBTQ as child-rapists, and we don’t care what they think. We tell them they’re wrong and to respect us. Same here.


  • I hope you some day learn that everything in life is made up of many, smaller, things. And I hope that gaining that knowledge empowers you to feel like you have control over at least some of the stresses in your life. And I hope that leads you to a place where you’re not angry and lashing out at the very people you seek validation from. And I hope that when you stop pushing people away, you will receive the validation you need - that we all need, as human beings - and you can feel the relief you’re currently searching for. And that some day, the comments in this thread will seem like a silly thing to have been upset about.

    I hope you find the peace you need. Have a good day.


  • i still really don’t give a shit

    Ok, don’t respond.

    i’m not going to engage just because you tell me too

    Ok, don’t respond.

    repeatedly telling me i should engage on “burning books is bad” is the transphobic part.

    Topics in life are nuanced and intersect. Burning one book with the reasoning that it’s fighting transphobia does not nullify the other things that book burning represents. If book burning being bad is transphobic, then fascists are trans-positive. Clearly, that’s not how the world works. An action is not defined solely by intent, but also by how it is received by others. You do not get to define how your messages are received, and part of human socialization is navigating how others feel about what you do. Communication is a two-way street, but you’re demanding that only your way matters.

    i don’t need to explain myself or my actions.

    Ok, don’t respond.

    i don’t need to justify them to you or anyone else.

    Ok, don’t respond.

    now please, could you leave me the fuck alone?

    You could have exited the conversation by not responding.




  • Grass Spider. It’s not a funnel-web, because those are very darkly colored (almost exclusively solid black), are a type of tarantula, and are exclusive to places where a tree like this would never grow.

    Fun fact about grass spiders: they are quite nearly pacifistic when it comes to threats. They will make an attempt to ‘attack’ the threat, which means lunging forward and slapping it with their front two feet, hoping to scare it off in fear of a bite. They will never bite though, and if the false attack doesn’t scare away the threat, they immediately run and hide. Besides, grass spiders are harmless to humans - whereas funnel-webs have venom that is of medical significance and can even be deadly.

    Fun fact 2: a grass spider will gladly move into an abandoned web of another grass spider. Two webs in our house stayed up for years, alternating between being vacant or having different occupants. They even repaired the web regularly. We took to calling the webs ‘apartments’, because they really were.



  • That was a >100gb download that took the moderators time to download and test. And the admins weren’t involved. All the claims of admins backing the torrent or deleting comments has had zero proof, as it was all hysteria drummed up by the psychotic cracker called Empress, who has had a long standing imaginary feud with 1337x.

    1337x can have malware in anything, as anyone can upload. The volunteer moderators downloaded and tested it as soon as they could. I’m sorry some people downloaded it faster, but there’s no conspiracy here.


  • Nuance is needed here… The terms high- and low-functioning are definitely problematic, because they’re too reductionist, and lead people to assume things. But I wouldn’t go so far as to say that autism having “levels” is bad - the DSM-5 (as horribly flawed as it is) contains two sets of three levels each for determining level of support needed by an autistic person, with the two sets being related to socialization and life-skill functioning. Given that autism is a spectrum, and some autistic people aren’t disabled by it at all, being able to categorize people by their needs is useful - we just have to make sure that it’s qualitative, rather than arbitrary labels being picked by how the doctor is feeling that day. And it’s something to be kept in medical records, not used for self-identification.


  • As someone who highly values spending time just thinking, it does take a level of privilege to do so. If your needs aren’t met, or your life isn’t safe/secure, letting the mind wander is giving it the ability to latch onto these distressing topics and create loops of anxiety and stress.

    As much as I value spending my time thinking, I also value ways of shutting my brain off so that I don’t have another panic attack about how I can’t afford groceries yet or not knowing if my housing situation is secure. I can’t feel like my life is collapsing if I distract myself.

    And more people than not are struggling to make ends meet, so I imagine more people than not have stresses they need to put out of mind, just to retain their sanity.