I don’t even know what you could do to make the battery that awful that quickly and not be physically damaged. Like I’m legitimately baffled.
Maybe someone left it baking in the sun it’s entire life? I’ve never tried leaving batteries at like 140f (60c) all day. Honestly I’d really like to know how it’s physically possible.
What standby mode does your laptop use? Classic S3 standby, or S0 standby like most modern laptops are forced into?