When I was a teen, idk 15 or so, was just walking back to my house from the non-fenced backyard. Noticed my shoe was untied, noticed an old steel dolly nearby. Dolly was laying upside down, tongue up …so I had the great idea to use the extra height of the dolly so I wouldn’t have to bend down all the way…well I learned about levers that day …the top handle came screaming for the top of my head and then I just seen stars while on my but.

Years ago I was working construction on a house and a iron clamp (around 2 or three pounds) under tension with a chain snapped and flew towards me and hit me above the forehead hard enough it spun me ass over tea kettle off of a scaffold where I belly flopped onto concrete about 6 or 7 feet down. I woke up about ten minutes later with paramedics around me laying in a pool of blood. I was air lifted by helicopter to the city around 80 miles away.

I still have a nice 2 inch scar on my head from where it hit, but thankfully I have a nice thick skull and I didn’t get any brian dabblage :)

Once, when I was a kid (albeit old enough to know better) I was playing underneath a tall warehouse-style shelf. I could just stand up underneath it, so what do I decide to do? Jump as hard as I can, of course!

I’m not sure how I didn’t end up in hospital on that one.

When I was seven or eight, my siblings and I were playing a game where we put the clothes hangers with the clippers on the ceiling fan, turned it on, and see where they flung. One of them headshotted right into me.

I suppose running down the stairs when I was 5 or 6. Look I was really excited to use those stickers. Tumbled head over heels down the basement stairs and struck the top of my head on the support beam at the bottom. Ended up getting stitches, a bear stuffy, and topical cocaine so obviously I came out ahead

When I was in elementary school there was a kid that kept bullying me. One day I was walking home with my older brother, and the jerk was chucking rocks at us. We both kind of ignored him until he pelted me in the side of the head, leaving a nasty ass welt. My brother chased him down after that, picked him up, and threw the jerk and his skateboard across the road. I didn’t get fucked with again, and later on in high school the guy apologized to me.

I don’t really talk to my brother anymore after he pulled a gun on my friend he was dating, but I’ll always remember the time he defended the fuck out of me.

When I was two or three I hit my head on the corner of a table in a post office and had a huge gash above my eyebrow. It had to be stitched and for some reason the doctor didn’t allow my mom to hold my hand. She still kicks herself for not insisting enough. I don’t remember it at all apart from the scar.

Earlier today I tried to swat a fly with my car door, but since I was looking down at the fly I only managed to slam that door into my head with all my strength, stunning me for several seconds

Sledding as probably a 4-year-old. Ran straight into a metal picket fence post. Had quite the goose egg.

I fell on my head in a roller derby bout once. It must have looked pretty ugly because the refs stopped the jam immediately; But, in anticlimactic fashion, my S1 did a great job protecting my noggin.

I had a bit of a headache but no concussion.

I did half a backflip once.

I was wearing a helm and got away with a concussion that kept me home for a week.

Fell out of high-chair at age 2, faceplanted and bit through tongue with the only 2 teeth I had at the time. Now have a second uvula on the bottom of my tongue.

Fell off of rocking chair at age 5, smacked forehead on concrete basement floor and now have permanent skull deformation on left side of forehead.

Wacked in the back of head with mop handle by brother pretending to be Jon BonJovi at age 5, 5 stitches and small divot in the skull back there.

Hit on head by rock thrown by neighbor kid age 6, no significant damage.

Fell off bike akira-sliding into driveway at age 7, pizza-faced for a month.

Fell off footpath bridge headfirst on to rocks age 9, 6 stitches administered at a vet’s office because christian day schools are wild as fuck.

Head accidentally slammed in car door age 14.

Suckerpunched in a mugging at 17.

Hit in head by rock that fell off a passing dumptruck age 20, 8 stiches and was extremely lucky that I caught it on the second bounce.

There’s probably more that I’m forgetting (because you know, 10 head injuries.)

Slipped backwards while ice skating and my head hit the ice.

Sailing… And the wind changed and I didn’t notice quick enough and got smscked it the head by the boom and would have fallen into the water if my buddy didn’t pull my stunned as back into the boat. I was pretty new to sail and learnt that Lesson the hard way.

Swimming.

Miscounted strokes while doing backstroke. Right on the soft spot of the head.