Give me your worst, Lemmy! Absolutely nothing is off limits. Let’s get fucking weird!
I post this here because /c/iama doesn’t seem to be a thing…
Don’t hold back you jerks!
EDIT: It’s just about 05:00 for me. Night night! I’ll answer any other questions. In a few hours!
Not the OP, but if you are soliciting opinions…
For me it’s the fact that nobody really believes us when we talk about our issues or even the things we personally experience. Even well meaning people, even friends, immediately assume that we are exaggerating or imagining things when we talk, or assume they know better about what is or is not harmful to us.
Like the obvious hateful transphobes are one thing. But getting that attitude from people one knows personally is tiring and more than a little scary.
What’s your opinion of the designated hitter rule in major league baseball?
Thank you for proving my point.
I don’t know who Chris Chan is, sorry.
would you say you’re more on the drigh side or the hunk side?
Vim or Emacs?
Vim all the way!!
Are you AVAB (assigned Vim at birth) or are you trans-editor?
Definitely AVAB. I love working through a terminal. One cannot do everything on iTerm2 as one could do on a Debian distro, but it gets pretty close.
Have you even tried emacs?
Gotta be honest…Maybe once.
sudo apt install mousepad
For most tasks, it’s fine. I originally bought a MacBook because I wanted to do Obj-C programming for iPhone OS, as it was called at that time. However, my ex-wife became pregnant and gave birth to our son. He is almost 16 now, and I cannot seem to find the joy in anything that I once did. He is a sophomore now, once he starts college, I will try to chase my dream of being an indie iOS dev. I really wanted to be a r.petrich of JB fame, but it seems that JB is not for the masses anymore.
I would recommend giving it a try, there is doomemacs if you’re feeling like learning or spacemacs if you don’t. Both have a vi-like usage.
Good choice.
It is the only choice. This is the way? Wait, is that not appropriate here? I’m not high anymore, but I am still very drunk 😅
Though I will be honest, mousepad is very convenient. Useful? Not really. But changing an env var? Pretty easy. Is that a sin?
Nope. If it’s comfortable and useful to you, it’s the right choice. I’ve reasons that I prefer (neo)vim to other options - namely that I live in the terminal and have worked with a lot of remove hosts. But, any option out there that works for you is the right choice. I’ve used EMACS before and it’s a great tool too just not as well situated in my patterns of usage for me to find it useful to me.
What’s the hardest part of being out as trans, other than the obvious transphobes? The subtle stuff most people don’t think about, I mean.
For me, the hardest part is trying to figure out where I belong. In Viet culture, at a party, the guys hang with the guys, and the girls with the girls. Even when I put a full face on, I never feel like I am one of the girls. It doesn’t help that everyone knew me before I came out. So I don’t fit in anywhere. It’s lonely. My sister Chi Man tries to help, but I am usually the odd one out. This has been going on for years now, so I have tried to make peace with it. This is a lonely life. With that said, I do not regret my decision to live as the person I am meant to be.
All I need in this life is my son and my best friend. That is enough for me.
I’m glad you have a good relationship with your son. :) I’m one of those weirdos that’s super close with my mom, and it’s an absolutely awesome relationship to have a parent that you’re close with. Not enough people get that.
I prefer MacOS overall. Explain to me why I am so wrong!
My rPi is obvs on Debian, but does Plex really count?
I can’t because I’m still using my old Mac Pro 2013 with other Apple products.
It was only 2 years ago that I replaced my late-2010 unibody MacBook. Add an SSD and 16GB of ram; it will make your machine feel somewhat modern. Officially, they support up to 8GB (I think) of ram, though OWC seems to say otherwise. Dosdude1 has utitlities that can get newer versions of MacOS to run on older hardware. I had Catalina running with no issues on my old MacBook. Though, VMs didn’t like it.
I used mine with legacy patcher but I see that my old Mac can’t handle the new instruction set (AVX2) since it doesn’t support it. I still have my Macbook 2017. But still I miss the days of upgradable Macs.
Agreed! I have only ever used Linux on Chromebooks or rPi (or through VM), so I cannot speak to the ease of use on Macs. I still would choose a Mac over Windows any day.
I bought my 2019 MBP on marketplace a couple of years ago. I didn’t do my research, and found out that the ram and SSD were soldered on, and married to the got dang machine. I like to make things work that shouldn’t, so I was up for a challenge!
Mac on the laptop + Linux on the server = pure heaven.
Because Windows is just better.
GOTCHA!!! Obviously, the reason is because any Linux Distro is not only free, installable anywhere, much more compatible with everything and much more open, but can also be configured to look and have features like MacOS.
As long as you don’t use a Mac in a business environment
Your opinion on programmer socks?
Hold up, are we talking about those knee high socks that don’t match with any clothing what-so-ever??
https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/c/unixsocks
or, i don’t know how im supposed to link communities on here
Hi! Also a trans girl. (But only high on caffeine, and not drunk because it’s end of the month and I’m broke.) Let’s get to the question that really, really define the future.
What are the best and coolest locomotives? (don’t need to be the same! and often aren’t!) 🚆
I am a huge fan of AbroadInJapan. I’d be really curious to try the night train!
Here is an alternative Piped link(s): https://piped.video/channel/UCHL9bfHTxCMi-7vfxQ-AYtg
Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.
I’m open-source, check me out at GitHub.
Not op, and chiming in for my kid, but the Southern Pacific, Daylight is a nice looking engine/color scheme (gs-4 engine). Personally, I like the balloon stack of the Jupiter. (We like steam here)
In the next few years, we’ll travel out to see the 4449 in action, and although I’m not very into trains, my kid’s excitement will be contagious, it’s great.
This may not apply to you but I might be able to offer some perspective from the other side here. I’ve been very close with someone through their 3+ years transitioning. I often had to tell my friend that situation she is complaining about was not transphobic or say “ok so what?”
In the beginning she would receive lots of weird looks, rude comments and misgendering. These would crush her and when she thought she was making good progress these comments would drag her back to square one. I understand how traumatizing that must have been.
But as the transition got more underway and she passed better this was happening less and less but my friend still held those insecurities and kept seeing weird looks and finding “rude” comments in places where they didn’t exist. This obviously didn’t change how they felt but I think its important for them to understand that this was in their head and can be solved by them being more confident. I gave their examples leeway and only battled on situations where I was very confident but I’m sure there were times I dismissed legitimate complaints.
She’s settled now and is living her life normally only rarely getting slapped with a transphobic comment and when that happens can take it in her stride.
I believe that yas girling every complaint is unhealthy and does not promote growth. The people around you need to disagree with you and ground you in reality sometimes. And sometimes trans people’s complaint are exaggerated or imagined.
This part may be a hot take but I think even when a trans person did receive a mean comment it can be fine to dismiss their complaints. If they are years into transition and getting upset over someone being mean then they need to find a way to cope better because it’s not healthy to let people you don’t care about have that kind emotional power over you.
What’s the trick to making a good grill cheese sandwich?
Whatever you do, do not use mayo.
finally! whoever told me to use Mayo on the outside is a clown. i ruined both a sandwich and mayo at the same time!
I guess my question’s always been that since gender is (to my incomplete understanding) a social construct and can change, and transgender people seek to change to a gender that feels more appropriate, how did you (a) know what felt right, (b) that what felt right wasn’t completely appropriate for your gender and the active definition of gender needed to change, and © where does chemical and surgical transition factor in for a gender based thing when attempting to find for comfortable self? Because that seems like a sex (in the clinical terminology) thing as much as a gender one (which of course there’s probably a connection, I guess I’m just not clear where the line really breaks.)
To be clear, I think my questions are entirely too “rationalizing a deep emotional and person thing” so I don’t really expect an answer, I’ve just never been invited to address the question to anyone before.
Not OP, but gender identity is a real biological thing that is linked to brain chemistry. Gender expression is the social construct. Sex is your body phenotype, which correlates to your genotype.
Thank you, I think that helps parse out where I was unclear. There’s specifics in the language at play. It makes me wonder how often bad actors prevention of even small distinctions being discussed has made it muddier and harder for everyone else.
Gender is not a social construct, its neurochemical. Gender roles are a social construct.
Social constructs are neurochemical…
utsnameis not astruct, it’s microelectronics.Like it or not, everything you experience is neurochemical. You are neurochemical. Nothing exists for any of us outside our brains.
I agree, but in this context it isn’t helpful, the same way particle physics and quantum mechanics isn’t helpful in a discussion about economics.
Actually it is very much central.
Gender is a LARP construct forced onto us by social norms derived from religion. It does exist in our brains, and is every bit as real as the next thing; but unlike physically verifiable facts, it only exists because we think of it. We should really be at the very least conscious that our fight for tolerance wrt individual gender expression has nothing to do with our sexual parts, everything to do with the artificial restrictions, limitations, gatekeeping, and denial that society as a whole, and many of its members, are literally forcing onto us.
The fight isn’t about boobs, asses, and genitalia. The fight is about using unrelated, and unrelatable, physical attributes (sex, skin color, or anything else), to coerce, dominate, emprison, and kill.
If we miss that central point, and let the ill intended offenders frame the narrative, we have already lost.
Because the topic is NSFW : How did transition impacted your sex-life ?
That’s a great question!
Transitioning left me with a tiny “dating” pool. Most of my “dates” were with chasers on Grindr or Taimi.
Except for the 2 sexual assaults, I’ve been fine with serving my purpose. After the 2nd rape, though, I gave up on casual encounters and dating in general. I haven’t had an actual relationship with anyone in about 7 years.
I will likely never meet someone who likes me for me. It took me YEARS to accept this difficult truth. It contributes to my depressive episodes all of the time.
I’d rate myself as a 6/10 on a good day. It’s just really hard to find guys that are interested in me beyond the fetish that they see. It’s easier to give up.
Holy shit, 2 rapes…
So sorry that you had to go through this. And I wish you all the best for the future
Can I ask, does this include T4T too for you?
I don’t really identify with a sexual or romantic preference. 99% of the time these days, I like dude
How are/were you able to answer all of the questions in such a coherent manner, going as far to properly using markdown for certain responses? (Coming from a person who hasn’t had experience with getting high)
I’m not quite sure to be honest. The hangover was, and still is, insane. I shouldn’t have been able to form coherent thoughts, let alone proper formatting.
