Further information on the situation with the transphobia: Abigail has repeatedly misgendered me and defended her choice by saying she chooses to refer to all people of unknown gender as male.
Hey, Abigail here. I just want people to know the reason this person got banned is likely because of a deleted comment not included in that thread. OP called me ~~autistic ~~ mentally unwell for not liking politics. THAT kind of behavior is not acceptable on lemmy.blahaj.zone, so I reported the comment and let Ada handle it. Ada tried in good faith to reason with OP but it was clear they just wanted to fight. So yeah, they got banned. Ada’s a fantastic lady who’s been great at keeping the trolls at bay.
Edit: and the bit about me misgendering them is also wrong. Gender didn’t come into play until after I had left the conversation. English default on the internet is male for strangers.
Source:
https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/comment/2319669
WRT the statement that I accused them of autism for not liking politics, further info is available here: https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/comment/2319669 https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/comment/2320815 https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/comment/2321026
Language is not a static thing, it’s not etched in stone tablets.
How difficult is it to refer to a person as “they/them” if you don’t know their preferred pronouns?
I hope this gets resolved to everyone’s satisfaction.
(I find conflict upsetting and often impulsively jump in to try to help/fix the situation even when I don’t know how to help. If I’m not welcome, please let me know and I’ll delete this comment)
I know nothing about this whole affair, but the tabloid-like inflammatory way this is phrased is immensely offputting.
I went digging into this, and there is definitely a side to this story that OP is conveniently omitting. They claimed that everything is political. Their original accusation of Transphobia against a Trans Person was not because of the above statement, but because that person said they desired a safe space without politics. Ada never defended the above statement, she tried to reason with OP that you can’t expect fellow queer folks to have the spoons to be political all of the time.
A couple days after making my account, I saw someone on Blahaj engaging in the tired old cliche of “I hate politics, there’s no politics on my social media and I want to keep it that way!” Well we’ve all heard the joke that the two races are white and political, the two genders are male and political, and the two sexualities are straight and political. Hatred of politics is a transphobic, sexist, and racist trope. And having sufferred harassment and abuse from people inside the queer community who “hated politics” and saw trans or nonbinary or xenogender identities as political, I knew this kind of speech was going to make bigots feel comfortable saying they also hate politics, and they think us trans people are it.
This is from OPs last post, which is where the above statement was posted in reply as a comment. At that point, their accusation of transphobia was SOLELY based on a trans person not wanting politics on their social media. Personally, as someone who has multiple disabilities, I think it’s ableist to suggest that my entire existence needs to be political.
Straight up having a place I can go where my existence is not considered political is really nice
I can just go and be me
Who I am, what I am, where I’m from, how I got to where I am now, none of that matters
I can be here and be me
Having that is so immensely valuable to people it’s amazing
It’s a breath of fresh air in a world full of shit
Can you chill? English default for unknown gender is to use masculine pronouns. I still use they because fuck English, but he is the default. From what I have seen so far, you’re just being obnoxious. If you don’t like what blahaj.zone is doing, leave.
“He” as default hasn’t been the norm for decades. Generic “they” is relatively new (and very old in other ways), but “he/she” and similar constructions have been around going back to the 70s.
he/she is the same situation, just it only excludes nb people instead of nb and women.
“He” being the default should probably change, but it is the default many use and have used for centuries.
incorrect. “he” for unknown gender is entirely an internet thing, because of the misogynistic assumption that everyone on the internet is male. in real life, youd always use “they” and not even notice as a native speaker
Yes, thank you. I have been reading this thread a bit bothered by that. “Everyone on the internet is a dude” is very 2009 Internet. Just use they or infer from the person’s username. This drama is silly, and OP stands to benefit from backing off, and it’s not inherently a transphobic assumption, but it may be casually misogynistic in a way that definitely is not intended but is still a bit of a throwback to those old-school assumptions about 'net demographics.
This tendency is why I have my actual name in my username. I feel as though I have to beat people over the head with “I AM A WOMAN”, because otherwise they’ll assume I’m a guy. I get enough of that IRL.
deleted by creator
Shut the fuck up
I have not read your post. I will not read your post. Ada has been an amazing admin in every way and any accusation of transphobia lobbied against them is ridiculous. She has created and maintains an accepting space for trans people (nb people included). Those actions speak louder than any words she may have written anywhere anytime.
In another thread on this topic, I stated I had yet to’ve had a reason to hate you
This is still true.
These continued attacks on two of your (allegedly) fellow trans people have caused me to start to develop a dislike of you.
Why don’t you go attack a cis person?
They’re constantly fucking up on the fediverse and being abrasive to them is funny and a moral good.Instead you have been directing your efforts and ire at impugning the motives of two people who—IF they are propagating transphobia—would themselves be victims of it. And you treat them as though they are outside their own community, assaulting it. You give bad faith readings. Worst, you try to turn communities against them. Not very Hank Venture of you.
You are annoying as fuck. Would you could find a proper target for that you could be a powerful tool against oppression. As things are you’re just a tool.
You handle isolated points on which you’re right entirely the wrong way.
Someone calls a blue object purple, you don’t just say, “It’s blue.” You get custom knuckledusters crafted with " B " " L " " U " " E " across 4 fingers and start punching “Ǝ U ⅃ ᗺ” bruises into the face of the person who called it purple and everyone around them.To protect a community from its own members? Direct that ire outwards.
Assuming, of course, you’re not just a troll as we went over earlier.
Only about 40% believe you’re real.If as seems increasingly more likely you are trolling then I don’t like you one bit, though cannot bring myself to not consider the time you said you were allergic to grass to not be funny. Like if you’re a troll you can go fuck yourself and a few other choice suggestions, but I’ll still go ahead and clap for that.
And if you’re not I would suggest you abandon this account, think hard about how you come off to your community and try again with a new account that acts less annoyingly (except to cis people because fuck them).
I only see some trolls trying to make a mountain of a molehill. Feel free to move on to greener pastures, whatever that means for you.
Male as default is archaic and misogynist. I expected better.
Still, it’s not worth two posts on main advising people of horrible stuff.
This is weak bait
Stop trying to create a scandal. Your bad faith is completely obvious here.
I dont come here for drama, is this high school?
Holy fuck, move on already. I’m seeing your cry for attention all over the fediverse. Go do something else, anything. Your day will get better.
Please do.
You’re welcome. This user is receiving a lot of support from the Blahaj community and admins and it’s very appreciated to see someone come in with the hot take that misgendering trans people is wrong
This is such a shitty way to frame it.
I think folk should default to neutral pronouns, especially in trans safe spaces. But phrasing a failure to do so it as “misgendering trans people” is jumping straight to the most absolute bad-faith interpretation.
Then further, saying that anyone who does it is “a transphobe” is way off base. (It reminds me of Contrapoint’s bit about essentialism)
It’s also notable to me that you’re not asking for e.g. any change of policy here. You’re not trying to improve the way this instance is run to discourage folk from using masculine defaults.
You’re using this incident only to wage war against someone you were already in conflict with, and assuming that anyone who steps in and criticizes your behavior is taking sides in that conflict.
Thank you, this is really well put.
Most braincells in this thread^^^^
