You gotta admit this post is a little ironic.
I think what a lot of people mean by that is “you always have to make other people feel as if they’re wrong”
Pretty much, if you are like the “average redditor” guy’s videos, then people aren’t going to like you, even if you are technically correct.
There are also plenty of people who know a lot about adjacent subjects, think that they are correct all of the time, and are confidently wrong. Both kinds of people suck to be around.
If 1 person has said something in this vein to me, I would not think much of it, if 2 or more people said it, then I would really take a hard look at myself and how I can better empathize with people.
They’re implying you’re difficult.
Not every conversation has to be a competition.
Like in the Walking Dead games… Silence is a valid option.
“Yes, I know. And experientially it is horrifying to recognize how wrong all of you are all the time. It is a living nightmare.”
If this is true for anyone, they need to change their circumstances.
The reminder of:
“If you run into an asshole in the morning, you ran into an asshole. If you run into assholes all day, you’re the asshole.” - Elmore Leonard
Take their concerns seriously, but not necessarily literally.
Maybe they’re accurately describing something you do. Maybe not.
Do you try to continue conversations when the other person is trying to disengage? That’s an actual thing that many people do; maybe that includes you. Try different approaches, like “Hmm, I still disagree, but I don’t need to continue talking about this either” — or just noticing whether it’s really important to you to press the subject, and whether the other person is receptive.
Pay attention to the other person’s discomfort there. Even if you’re right and even if it’s important, if someone is tired of hearing your opinion, they’re not going to change their mind.
Even if they’re not accurately describing you, they’re still describing what you seem like to them, at that moment. They may be insecure about their own understanding or judgment, and feel like you have more power than them in the situation, and that you’re using it poorly. (But the one thing not to do to an insecure person is to call them insecure.)
One thing they’re almost certainly not trying to do, is to escalate the argument to the meta-level of arguing about how good or bad you are at arguing.
If it’s a loved one, maybe they don’t want an argument; maybe they want a hug. (Ask.)
Yep, 90+% of any conversation is about how you’re making the other person feel, not about any actual content of the words being said.
And if anyone just read that and thought “bullshit, that’s stupid and illogical,” I have some bad news for you about how brains work. (Also: I used to think like that too.)
Our ancestors used their mouths to make emotional noises long before they used their mouths to express logical propositions.
We can never do just one thing with language. Every time we’re making a factual statement, we’re also saying something about our mood, and our relationship to our audience, and so on. That’s just part of what language does.
Think why people say that.
It may be a) you really do act like that, or b) you talk to people who don’t like to discuss or learn things.
It can be both. Maybe you talk to the wrong people, but still come off as preachy.
So if someone tells you that, ask what they mean.
“Ok”.
Start with first principles - who is saying this, and are they correct?
Take the Keane Reeves approach to having a relaxed life - don’t have any arguments, to paraphrase him “Two plus two equals five? OK great, have a nice day, see you around!”
There are basically two main possibilities:
- They’re unreasonable.
- You’re unreasonable.
If it’s the first one, it doesn’t really matter how you respond. The best policy is to avoid dealing with people like that as much as possible.
If it’s the second one then you should work on trying to fix it. That’s the best way to respond.
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your both unreasonable.
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your both reasonable but having communication issues.
s/your/you’re/
I think he meant “your both unreasonable personalities”
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deleted by creator
There’s nothing wrong with being right all the time, but relationships need more than just the exchange of facts. If all people know you for is the guy who is right all the time (or needs to be right all the time), then maybe you’re neglecting the other aspects of those relationships. There needs to be other things people remember you for.
Being right feels good no? Imagine being told your wrong all the time by the same person. Thats how they feel. Unless its a matter of life or limb, just let people be wrong sometimes.
Just because you are right, doesn’t mean you are relevant or the other person is wrong.
Don’t. Stop talking, turn and walk away, never say another work to them. Will piss them off to no end.
“You only seems to ask stupid questions.”
“I only happen to always be right when it involves you.”
“I grant you the last word.”
I know, thank you.
“yep.”
I remember someone saying that and how much it hurt. Because I feel if I know the answer, I am compelled to share it. I see it as a need on their side that I should fulfill. I am a “how can I fix it” mentality. But some people are complaining or speaking just to be heard. They want commiseration, not answers.
If it’s someone close to you, then speak about it — “I’m sorry, I thought you wanted an answer or suggestion, I feel I should provide if I can. Is that not what you’re looking for?”
If it’s someone else, whose opinion is not necessary, you can make a mental note to let them have their delusions, just maybe not with you around.
my experience with being called a ‘know-it-all’ is entirely from calling shit talking liars on their shitty little lies they want to spread.
examples include ‘obama was a muslim’, ‘trump’s a great businessman’, ‘conservatives are for small government and freedom of speech’ etc.
present them with evidence that not only contradicts their thesis but refutes it completely and suddenly ‘you’re such a know it all!’
lolol
Such a strange insult, know it all. Right up there with “do-gooder”. Am I? Okay.
See also: social justice warrior. That sounds badass as fuck when you look at the words themselves rather than the misanthropic brainwashing behind the expression!
Add ‘woke’ to that list tbh. I have no idea how that word went from meaning a good thing to meaning a bad thing. If you watch the first ‘Shazam!’ movie, the word is used in a positive light when a character tells someone to get woke. Now at the time of the second Shazam! movie the word means something different with a negative connotation.
Conclusion: we should have prevented the second Shazam! movie.
