What a horrible day to have genitals.
Why did I learn how to read?
Society forced you. Time to burn it all down.
I knew I was right to blame society for everything!
Because you had better parents than Jared, 19.
It’s a terrible day for rain.
You can un-learn easily enough: here’s a ball-peen hammer
Alcohol … Lots and lots of alcohol over many years does the same thing
Only two cures to a hangover: Don’t start, or don’t stop.
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Ok I guess we both have it bad
A fart is nowhere near as bad as the inside of a dirty toilet 😅
I think I’d rather have my junk hanging outside my body than to have a fart do a 180 on me
As a pussy haver. What the fuck
Today we encounter the “pussy havers” and the “pussy have nots” learning side by side! Spectacular!
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I was helping my daughter (3) pee. Pee came out of 3 places at once at one point, then 2.
I’ll keep my ding dong, thanks.
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The dreaded double dutch
Don’t put fish in a dutch oven
Instructions unclear… just shit in Koi pond while attempting to Dutch oven a fish.
God: this is why I made everything a sin.
W-what?
If only my dick was big enough to touch the inside of the bowl
Tell me about it. My short stack can only rest comfortably on my nuts perched on the seat - it’s that or having my head get shredded by the razor edge of the seat lol
Lil dick click rise-up! We need to fight for our RIGHTS. We can’t take this shit no more!
Is that when your dick is buried into your nut suck so when you pee, you piss all over your balls?
Hilarious, but Buried Penis is a real condition. Small dick + overweight can be a horrible combo. If you have huge balls it’s probably the ultimate triple threat. Best be carrying wet wipes to freshen up heh
Don’t use me to feel better about your shit, little dick.
Relax guys. We all know girls don’t fart.
I can tell you haven’t met my GF.
At least we can all relate to water splashes.
Oh man I had diarrhea in a porta-potty a couple weeks ago and got some splash back. I was not a happy camper.
I call bullshit. No one survives the blue touch.
Was it almost full or something? Usually the… stuff… is pretty far below the seat
That diahrea might have been extra energetic; falling at faster than terminal velocity
Oh yeah it is as super energetic
Neptune’s Kiss…
Poseidon’s Kiss™️
Lol (not porn, but on redgifs because nsfw I guess?) https://www.redgifs.com/watch/unhealthylivelybarbet
A perfect example of something that should be tagged NSFW, but isn’t porn.
Cold water splashing on our buttholes is the great gender equalizer.
If you live in europe or asia (i think) then probably not
im with everyone here. what the fuck
The old witches kiss
In Portuguese Brazilian this has this exact name! Wow!
Same in French, le baiser de la sorcière.
Its neptunes kiss when you let a turd go and water shoots back up your asshole from the splash.
illustration: https://youtu.be/_eTsrtZdAJc
I don’t know what I was expecting
I’m a guy and I’ve had those farts that escape up between your leg and balls and pop out the top
Is it ok to like those?
Whatever tickles your pickle.
Fuck you, well done.
I’m 39 and they make me giggle like an idiot
Slouching at the PC gets me every time :(
What the fuck
(cis)Women also will never know the pain of sitting on their own balls.
Never happened. Is this even possible? They always find a way to slip up or down.
I sat on my balls a bit before seeing this thread, which is why I thought of it.
Definitely happens of you aren’t careful sitting down. Feels a bit like squeezing a grape too hard
Except when I squeeze a grape too hard, it doesn’t hurt me.
I once accidently kicked my self in the nuts when I went to sit down. It wasn’t pleasant.
I have also done this and never encounter anyone else who has.
Brother!
Its happened to me exactly once on a hard school chair and I still remember it, so uh yeah lol
Not inside the vagina, but the…bubble, for lack of a better term, can meander to the opening and sit there until you surreptitiously take a long stride. Might be what they mean.
