I’m about to start my 12 week paternity leave next week thanks to a state program and almost everyone that I’ve told has had their jaws on the floor that I would even want to do that.

Today I witnessed a group of coworkers almost bragging how little time they took after their kids were born. I’ve heard stuff like “Most men are hard working and want to support their families so they don’t take leave”.

To me it was a no brainer, I’m getting ~85% of my normal pay and I get to take care of my wife, our son and our newborn for 3 whole months. and for someone who hasn’t taken a day breathe in the past 3 years I think I deserve it.

I’m in the US so I know it’s a “strange” concept, but people have seemed genuinely upset, people it doesn’t affect at all. Again, it’s a state program available to almost anyone who’s worked in the past 2 years, I’ve talked to soon to be dads who scoffed at the idea and were happy to use a week of pto and that’s it.

I feel like I’m missing something.

  • viking@infosec.pub
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    3 days ago

    People are idiots. Why would you give up a benefit you’re legally entitled to? Nobody is going to as much as thank you for that.

    • TonyTonyChopper@mander.xyz
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      3 days ago

      In the US fathers don’t have any legal right to take time off from work. It’s expected that you would miss at most a few days for the hospital visit.

      • ZeroOne@lemmy.world
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        3 days ago

        Fathers don’t have a lot of legal rights there, don’t they (“There” as in USA)

      • Reyali@lemm.ee
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        2 days ago

        FMLA does cover leave for fathers, and in 2020 the DOL said 56% of US workers were covered by FMLA. That’s still a lot of people who don’t have those protections, but it’s still demonstrably incorrect to say there isn’t “any legal right [for fathers] to take time off from work.”

  • acargitz@lemmy.ca
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    3 days ago

    So basically, the choice is to spend 12 weeks with those idiots or with your baby? Seems like a no brainer to me.

  • Stepskippin@lemmy.world
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    3 days ago

    I WISH my husband had been able to take time off. Those first few weeks of sleep deprivation are fucking ROUGH on your own. I think you did the right thing and that the child is going to get dramatically better care because his parents are actually sonewhat rested.

  • obvs@lemm.ee
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    3 days ago

    In the U.S. we’re taught to brag about how much we’re exploited, as if it’s a virtue.

    It’s a very sick culture.

  • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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    2 days ago

    I’m all for paternity leave, but there is a conflict between taking time off to take care of your newborn, and taking time off to breathe.

    Newborns aren’t exactly a vacation.

  • Tot@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    Those 12 weeks will be no walk in the park. You rightfully state you’ll be taking care of everyone, and it’s 24/7 juggling new dynamics and a whole new human being’s needs.

    Yes, people survive with less time or no time off at all. I’m convinced some brag about it like some badge of honor to make themselves feel better.

    Thank you for being considerate of your family’s needs. Good luck!

  • Professorozone@lemmy.world
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    3 days ago

    Pretty sure THEY are the ones missing something. They’ve been brainwashed into thinking you should be embarrassed NOT to shun your family so you can be at work 24/7 to make someone else rich. Take advantage of that program while it still exists.

    • Korhaka@sopuli.xyz
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      3 days ago

      Furlough was such a sweet deal during the covid lockdowns. Like 80% pay and no work? Sign me up!

  • stardust@lemmy.ca
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    4 days ago

    Sounds like attitude of wage slaves that have been brainwashed into doing everything for the corpos and being fine with getting scrap. They live to work as opposed to work to live.

    Can’t change the slave mentality of some people. They were just born to be one.