I’m gonna be the world’s loudest pisser!
Choose One?
That question mark ❓ suggests the option I could take them all instead if I wanted…
I’d take all but the blue one. Once my powers become known, my crush would love me! Together we’d run my campaign for mayor. I’d win on the promise that the browns will win the superbowl. Yes, I’m making a fecies joke about the BROWNS wining the SUPERBOWL.
I just gotta make the other team shit their pants at the right times.
I mean, it’s not even a contest
I’d choose yellow as well. I imagine sound will reach like 90 dB!
What if I already have the blue pill power? Does it cancel out in some sort of strange overdose condition?
I would take the pink one, then find my least favourite people and make the infinite poop copypasta into reality…
I’d just tweet “poop” at Muskrat and Donald 24/7
You can do that rn if you wanted to.
I don’t want to create a Twitter account 😔
Fair enough.
I have a debilitatingly shy bladder in public washrooms, and I don’t know if pissing loud as fuck would be boon or a curse.
Do they have to have poop in them or does it spawn some inside them? That’s necessary information.
Spawns inside of them. Makes them shit even more and harder tbh
I think it would be just enough to go for those massive diarrhea spasms where you no longer even have anything to expulse but your body keeps pushing. Although I guess it would be cooler to have a Tarantino level spray, choco edition.
I already have all these powers… Maaaaan…
Are you the person who keeps mateiralising in my home and screaming “DEFECATE” then disappearing in a puff of fart-cloud?
I’ve had a leg injury lately and I can’t make it to my upstairs bathroom that fast. You have destroyed my stair carpet. The cleaner said it was “unsalvageable” and “honestly shameful”. You need to stop.
Jeez. All you mean people.
I’d take the pink pill and help people with intestinal blockages and stuff.
Why not both? Help the constipated AND make the world’s worst people shit themselves on live TV…
I’m just saying, no one’s talking about how you could help people with this too.
I don’t know anyone that needs help popping. I know many people who I’d like to make shit themselves.
I’m not arguing that these problems don’t exist. Just that I don’t personally know anyone that is dealing with it so it didn’t come to mind to use the shitting themselves power for good.
But what are the rules? Is it like death note where you need their name and be thinking of their face? Or is it “Hey, that 3rd grade math teacher who gave me a hard time. What’s her name? Forgot how she looks, too… she shits herself now!” Type of thing.
Just have to test it out and figure out how it works I suppose.
There’s not a few people you’d want to shit themselves to death? Not even Putin?
So it’s like having a Death Note but the only method of death is shitting themselves? I’m down.
Well you can get them to smear out symbols with their faeces before they die
Do I want to commit murder? No.
How about protect your friends and family from a predator?
I’m not going to play this game. It’s the same game people play with me when I say I don’t want to own a gun.
I have never been in such a situation, so I have no idea what I would do. As it is, my large, mean dog would make it unlikely.
Just accept that not everyone shares your violent fantasies.
okay but what if it was a gun that made people have to poop
That’s the best answer.
spoiler
I feel you’ve got a good personal reason behind it that most don’t. I haven’t seen anything from you about your health recently, so I hope you’re doing great, and that the move to the UK goes swell!
spoiler
Very slow improvements on the health front and I hope so too, thank you!
Sidebar:
I can only assume Ms. Squid has finished your sweater…
What’s the status on my Penguin sweater?
No rush, of course 😅
She has not! I was hoping it would be my Christmas present.
… I mean it still might be your Christmas present, just this year
She’s not that slow. She just switches between projects.
Just came here to say that this thread is lovely and I totally understand having a bunch of projects going at the same time. I hope ms Squid finds the time, that sweater sounds cute.
Pink please…
How does that work… spoken command? Is there a cool down on you/the victim? Can it be recorded/broadcasted? Does it has to be consciously be heard and understood or is it like the brown Note from Southpark?
Based on this, that power varies from nice/annoying trick to weapon of mass defecation.
I reckon it works like a power word.
I imagine its like the Bene Gesserit in Dune where they give commands. except you can’t do anything but make people shit their pants.
although that’s terrifying on its own and you could likely kill people by doing it too much.
If it is a power word it should be recordable (if the fidelity of the recording has all needed information in it).
That could be used as a weapon similar to the best joke in the world.
yay weed and friendship my two favorite things
Solid
I will just make every single human on earth poop every day at exactly 14:56 UCT
I wouldn’t say anything, and just enjoy seeing how people tries to figure out what’s going on. And maybe how a new religion is born of such a miracle.
That would destroy most places sewage systems lol
Pink would be politically beneficial. You could legitimately make major progress in the world with that power. Someone who disagrees with you tries to speak publicly? Time to poop. Hell. Just harass them with explosive diarrhea until they notice the trend that whenever they do something political, the diarrhea returns.
They’ll just take a page from the Trump playbook and start wearing diapers.
All diapers have their limit
